Wednesday, 27 November 2019

Eat the good chocolate . . . now . . .

One of the things I like most about getting up early in the morning is the fact that it gives me quiet time to think about things, without the din of the television or other distractions. That's my prayer time and my scripture reading time, but sometimes it is also my scroll through Pinterest Time or my Instagram time. I could spend quite a bit of time sitting on these two sites, scrolling through the feeds and looking at stuff.  If I am not careful, I can spend far TOO much time looking at everything.  They are filled with beautiful images of things I like, or find inspirational, or would like to cook, eat, make myself. 

We live in a world today when we are able to share intimate glimpses into other peoples lives, small snapshots of what they wish to show us and to present to the world. It would be very easy to become envious of these glimpses that we see.  What we have and who we are could very quickly and very easily become not enough.  I don't think any of us is exactly immune to that way of thinking.  


I actually sometimes feel afraid for the young women in the world today.  There are days when I feel that if I see one more trout pout I am going to scream.  We have raised a generation of women who think they have to be flawless, to look, dress and act like supermodels, and some of them are sadly raising their girls to be the same.  I see all kinds of them in my feeds, mincing and posing and playing for the camera.  It really disturbs me when I see these same women putting their little girls in front of the camera and then the little girls are posing, pouting, etc. 

I have even had a woman, meaning well I suppose   . . . contact me one time to ask if I wanted her to fix my profile photo on my food blog so that I looked better, thinner, younger. I know she meant well, but it really only ended up making me feel slightly inadequate. I got news for you folks, it isn't just skinny, young and attractive women who like to cook and who do it well!  (I blame Nigella, lol.) Experience counts for something!

It would be very easy for me to look at happy families, surrounded by children and grandchildren . . .  and to wish I had never been divorced. To start wondering what if?  I'll be honest,  I do wish that I had never gotten divorced at times.  It is sometimes very hard for me to look at these images without feeling a tinge of regret . . .  but I can't dwell on the what if's or if only's.  I have learnt to be able to look at these things and feel happy for those who have been very lucky and kept them, without feeling sad for myself and my losses.  But there are days that it does take a great deal of effort on my part.   All I ever wanted to be was a good wife and a good mother and to have my baby chicks around me. To have gotten to a stage in life where that just hasn't happened is very painful at times, and sometimes these images of happy families can be really soul destroying if I let them be.  It is especially difficult around the holidays.  I have learnt to appreciate the family that I do have and those that do love me and I try hard to ignore the ones who don't.  In the end it is really more about them than it is about me and I remind myself of that fact  often, and sometimes daily.

We see beautifully presented corners of people’s homes, but what they aren’t showing us is the stack of dirty laundry in the corner, the pile of dirty dishes in the sink, or the pile of books on the floor. (I have since sorted this corner, but thought I would show it to you pre-sorting.)

My cooking photos are edited to show you only what I want you to see, cropping out things that don't belong in the picture. Most of the time I don’t share my failures with you or the things that don’t look so good.  I don't think people really want to see failures.  I have shown you a few, but it really takes a great effort on my part to allow myself to do that.  When I share what I have cooked with you, I want it to be things that work and that taste good, or else why bother.

I guess what I am trying to say this morning is that we often talk about judging others and how wrong that is, but sometimes we need to stop judging ourselves as well.  We need to stop comparing ourselves to the brightest, most beautiful crayon in the box and to recognise that we are beautiful just the way we are.  We are all different and we all have different ways of doing things, different levels of financial worth, different lives we are living, different tastes, different families.  We have different strengths and different weaknesses.  Different talents. Each of us is beautiful and unique and pretty wonderful in our own very unique and valuable ways.  I may be fatter than you and my house may not be as well put together as some.  I might not have the newest furniture, or the prettiest car. I may have problems in my family. 

That's all okay.  That's life and
its real.  I'm real, and I
matter. So do

It would be very easy to waste these beautiful lives we've been given by spending them always comparing our lives to others, and never truly happily wanting and being content with what we already have and who we really are. I think its a shame that wisdom comes with age.  I sure wish I had been much smarter about things when I was younger.  I wish that I had enjoyed that young body when it was lean and lithe and beautiful instead of spending a lifetime thinking I was too fat, even when I wasn't.  I should have done more dancing in the rain and used my good china more often. 

I can tell you one thing however and that is this, in what little time I do have left I am going to dance in the rain more often and enjoy more of what I already have.  I am going to eat the good chocolate and not feel guilty. The time to be happy is now. The end.

A thought to carry with you.  

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•。★★ 。* 。
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˚ ˛ •˛•˚ */______/~\。˚ ˚ ˛
˚ ˛ •˛• ˚ | 田田 |門 ★

Don't wait for things to get better.
Life will always be complicated.
Learn to be happy right now, 
otherwise you will run out of time.
•。★★ 。* 。•。★★ 。* 。  

In The English Kitchen today  . . .  Deliciously Creamy Fresh Salmon Chowder.  Delicious!

Have a wonderful Wednesday.  Don't forget along the way of your day . . . 

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And I do too!   



  1. Hi Marie, I understand your yearning to be close to family especially this time of year. Sometimes I feel sad that my husband and I were unable to have children but then I realize that having children doesn't always mean they will be around to help in old age. They become estranged, or move away, or just can't be bothered. I especially miss having grandchildren. Being estranged from my sister and her children and grandchildren is difficult. But life goes on and our happiness should not depend on other people's actions. No one's life is perfect and somehow, it is reassuring to know that. Hugs, Elaine

    1. I wish you could have had children also Elaine, as I think you would have been a wonderful mom. The church I go to teaches us that all the blessings we haven't been able to enjoy here on earth will somehow be ours when we reach the Celestial Kingdom. Children who die in infancy or childhood, or who are stillborn will still be ours to raise, and those who have been unable to have children for whatever reason will be able to there. I know not how it works, but I believe it and it brings comfort to many people, or at least makes their losses easier to bear. I am sorry that your sister has chosen this path. Family really can be such stinkers. You are right our happiness should not depend on other people's actions. I, too, take comfort in knowing that I am not the only one in the position I am in. I wish we lived closer to each other because we could enjoy Christmas Dinner together perhaps. In any case know that my heart will be with you on Christmas Day, as it is every day! Ohhh, what a morning we have had. I spent all morning sorting out the kitchen. There is a nice box of things for the birds, and a box to take to the food bank, and I feel like a load has been lifted and I have a counter top now to work on! Fingers crossed it stays that way! haha Love and hugs, xoxo

  2. Yes, it would be lovely to live closer to each other and celebrate Christmas together. It is comforting to hear about your beliefs, Marie. I'm about to do a fridge "sorting" in preparation for all the extras that we must find room for this time of year. Wish me luck. But first, I'm off to get Million Dollar Chicken ready for the slow cooker. Never too early in the day to think about dinner is my motto, lol. Hugs,Elaine

    1. Todd doesn't understand the need to get in all the goodies for the holidays. Mind you he was born before WW2 began and grew up with rationing. I was blessed to have grown up in th age of plenty! Good luck with finding room for everything! Million Dollar Chicken, I am intrigued! Tell me more! I agree with your motto! Its the way I think as well! xoxo

    2. Marie, if you google "Million Dollar Chicken" the recipe will come up. In the end, I cooked it on top of the stove as we had to go to the grocery store for the salsa and ran out of time to use the slow cooker. Thought I had a jar but apparently not. It is called Million Dollar Chicken because it won a million dollars in a Pillsbury Bake-Off. We like it. I usually serve it over rice. I'm a bit like you Marie in that I like to make a recipe my own. I add sausage slices, small white onion chopped and carrots. If you try it, let me know how you like it. Hugs, Elaine

    3. Oh that sounds good! I will look it up for sure! I am going to respond to your e-mail with the lovely tortiere recipe today! Love you! xoxo

  3. I think everyone has a place in their lives where they wish some things were different.
    The What Ifs....
    The If Only I had not..

    The Why Me..s?

    It's probably natural.
    And I bet more people have regrets than not.
    I have a keen dislike for social media and yet I am immersed in stalking Instagram.
    I hate FB.
    And what it can do to people.
    I bet IG has the same effect.
    I couldn't open the video that I found this AM but it was about how addicting and awful social media is.
    Jacques was never a computer guy apart from work things and we find we each have PCS..laptops..tablets and phones..I mean
    What does the future hold?
    Would hate to be a teen today.
    Very happy that for the moment our Littles are more into sports.
    Max and Lucas are on IG..all ..not even! I find that admirable.Giu..not too much and the 2 youngest.. not at all.
    A true time thief.And I hate to say..I am into it.
    Blogging isn't the same I find?
    It's a diary of sorts.
    But IG one account leads to another..and you are overwhelmed by stuff..stuff and more stuff..yet I look..and admire and applaud..all sorts of things:)

    1. I admit I love IG. Its quick and its easy to leave a quick comment or just ♥ things. I would hate to be a teen today. If they had had social media when I was a teenager I would no longer be here. At least at home I was safe. Now teens are not safe anywhere they go. They can be harassed and bullied 24/7. I wonder what the future will hold myself. My church is moving really into home based study and worship, and a lot of what we do/see/study is online. We are lucky that we are still able to gather together on Sunday mornings, but for how long. We never know what the future holds for any of us I guess. I love to look at things on IG, but it would be very easy for someone to feel envious if they were so inclined! Thankfully I am not! xoxo

  4. We are all uniquely and beautifully made are are not meant to be all alike. We have God given differences. It would be a boring world if we were all alike and should be thankful for who we are and what we have. I agree, enjoy life while you have it the best way you know. We never know how long we will have it.

    1. I, like you, celebrate the diversity that is all a part and parcel of this wonderful world and life God has given us! You are a wonderfully positive person Pam! That is one of the things I love about you! xoxo

  5. Plenty of parents have "lost" children, lost in that they do not have contact, and it had nothing to do with divorce. It is a choice a lot of the younger generation are making today. I read another blog where many of us, in different stages, of being shunned, can go to read, and share. So no matter how perfect or imperfect, the life of the parents, has no bearing upon whether the youngers keep contact, Marie. It is astounding actually. I think often, too, esp. with divorce, the kids are told many lies about the other parent, which can result in this. It may be that one day they understand they were lied to...and maybe not. It is true that all of us believe whom we choose to believe too. Remember even the most perfect "parent" (GOD) had wayward children. I hope you can enjoy your holiday...we are trying ourselves. Hugs and love, Elizabeth xoxo

    1. You aren't wrong about any of this Elizabeth! I belong to a facebook page which deals with estranged family issues, but in all truth I find it more depressing than uplifting, and filled with anger. I totally understand anger and the rest of it, but really all I want is to have a loving, caring relationship with all my children. I don't hold out any hope that it will happen i this lifetime, but I know my Heavenly Father loves me and counts every tear. I hope you do have a Happy Thanksgiving. Love and hugs, xoxo

  6. My dearest friend, Thank you for sharing this one today. I needed to read it. I love you because you are real and I think you are beautiful inside and out. I loved every single word you wrote today. It is all so true. Deep wisdom does come with age, I think.
    I love you open and sharing heart. You are such a talented woman in so many ways. You are a gifted writer. Keep on sharing your thoughts with us.
    May you have a wonderful Thanksgiving if you celebrate it there.
    Just know you are loved by me and I'm sending hugs your way!
    PS. I haven't blogged for a while so I don't know where I am going with that one. Let's just stay connected no matter what.

    1. I have enjoyed all of your comments LeAnn! Thank you so much for each of them! I hope and pray that you, Roger and the family have a truly wonderful and blessed Thanksgiving. Do stay connected with me. I count you as one of my dearest online friends. xoxo

  7. Yes let's eat the good chocolate now and stop putting off using and enjoying the best we have. I like your photo of your fireplace area and then the photo showing a messy area next to it. Sometimes I think of that curating and editing of photos when I share photos of my garden and bouquets. There's lots of mess in my garden but I don't share that! Wise words from you.

    1. Thanks Terra! I think we do ourselves and others a diservice by making them think everything in our homes is always perfect! I like to show pretty things, but every once in a while a dose of reality is a good thing to show as well! Have a great day! xoxo


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