A scrapbook that just sort of grew,
Over the years along with you,
Without a set of rules or plan,
Just a plain tale that somehow ran
From birth to death in bright array,
The small events from day to day.
A Christmas card that took your eye,
A recipe for raisin pie,
The picture of a prairie town;
A young boy in a cap and gown,
The spittin' image of his dad,
When he was just a half-grown lad.
A post card frayed and worn a bit
And yet how much you treasure it,
Because it came one lonely dawn
When all your faith and hope was gone,
Its happy message, "Cheer up, Mum,
Hold down the old place till I come."
A golden wedding briefly told,
A picture of a four year old
Blowing her Birthday candles out;
A grandma growing nice and stout,
All dressed up for some affair,
In a new dress and lovely hair.
And here, between these happy ones
A recipe for raisin buns,
A way to mend old table cloths,
And what to do to rid out moths;
A snap of granddad if you please
Pruning his precious lilac trees.
A record sort of hit or miss
Of joy and sorrow . . . tears and bliss,
Of weddings . . . funerals . . . holidays,
Marching along Earth's varied ways,
A scrap book that just sort of grew
over the years, along with you.
~Edna Jacques, Scrap Book
Fireside poems, 1950
My late mother-in-law kept scrap books. (My second husband's mother) I used to love looking through them every time we would go to the Island for a visit. She had one for every year and they were filled with loads of things. Newspaper clippings that she found interesting, cards, flowers, neatly pressed between the pages, etc. They were wonderful to me. I wonder what was done with them when she passed last year. They really were a treasure.
I suppose this blog is kind of the same thing. Like an ongoing scrap book of things, happenings in my life, sweet memories, sometimes sorrows, things which catch my eye, all sorts. I started it thinking it would be a way to keep my children up to date with the goings-on in my life, but it has become so much more than that, and, I am sure, has meant much more to me than it ever will to them.
But you never know. I wish that I could afford to have the whole thing printed. Now THAT would be a herculean feat! It goes back many, many years now, to 2007, and I have been very diligent in recording things. Most years, every single day.
I had my father here for his supper yesterday. It was nothing spectacular. Just weiners and chips like my mother used to make for us sometimes. I did mine in the air fryer rather than the deep fryer. My father is not a hard man to please. He likes the simple things and he loved his weiners and chips. I cooked him some mixed vegetables on the side and he had a slice of bread and butter as well, along with copious amounts of tomato ketchup. I had made a peach cobbler for dessert, but then at the last minute thought that it might be too sweet for him. He is a diabetic and so I ended up just giving him a small bowl of ice cream and a cookie. He always looks for something sweet at the end of a meal.
He came right after he finished having tea at the Tim Hortons in town. His friend Anne had been there to have tea with him. He was really pleased about that. He likes Anne. It is a bit of company. The day before we had taken him with his friend Maryanne to the mall. He has never lacked for female companionship. He says that women say he is easy to love, and it appears to be true.
Anyways, I enjoyed spending the one on one time with him. He likes to watch Seinfeld on my Netflix. I always have the closed captioning on which he enjoys. We talked a bit and just basically enjoyed each other's company. It was nice.
For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord.
For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways,
and my thoughts than your thoughts.
Isaiah 55:8-9
One thing which I have struggled with through the years is perfectionism. Whenever I do anything I aim to be the best at it, to rise to the top, to be flawless in it's delivery. But, of course, I am not perfect and when what I do fails to reach the perfection I have planned, it can bring with it a sense of disappointment and frustration wherein I have to accept that I have not quite gotten there.
They say comparison is the thief of Joy. And indeed, there will always be someone who is that touch better at doing things than you are. When we think about it, this desire to be perfect is a true enemy of the soul. Like a troll it follows you around, stealing your time, killing your imagination, maybe even preventing you from starting something new. This insane desire for perfection can nudge us to obsess about something that is unrealistic or unattainable at this moment in our lives. It can convince us to try to make it happen anyways, drawing our attention away from everything else, causing us to lose sight of all the other joys of the journey.
I have come to realize however, that the only true failure comes from not even trying. And so I make myself do things, knowing full well that I will not be the "best" at it and that what I am doing will, in all likelihood, never be "perfect."
And I am finding "Joy" in the trying, even if I do fall short of what other's have achieved. Like these videos I have been making. Oh my, but they are very far from being perfect. I sometimes stumble when I am trying to explain things. There is no fancy musical introduction, no bells and whistles, but I am enjoying doing them. I love planning them and of course I am gaining more confidence with each one that I do.
At first I worried about being too "fat" or "old looking," but I had to just let all of that go and just be "me." Authentically, and unapologetically myself. What else can I be?
And I am grateful, well to a degree anyways . . . that I had that scare with the food blog, because it pushed me out of my comfort zone and into trying something else. Something which I probably never would have tried, had it not been for that. Who knows where it will lead. I am just enjoying it anyways, with all of it's beautiful imperfections. With time, I may even get better at it! You never know! In the meantime I am embracing being perfectly imperfect!
I had used the birthday money that my father gave to me earlier this week to purchase a portable hob/burner so that I can actually cook things in my food videos. Sometimes you do need to spend a bit of dosh to bring things more to life. I had also ordered a rolling tea trolly so that I could have my ingredients nearby. It got delivered yesterday, the portable hob/burner, and the tea trolly. Except that they made a mistake and delivered a bookcase not a tea trolly. And the bookcase was half the cost of the trolly. I had to contact Amazon and let them know. Not an easy thing to do at the best of times. It is really difficult to find the spot where you can actually speak to someone. I finally did however and they have refunded me for the tea trolly and they told me to just keep the bookcase. Bonus!
I am still out a tea trolly however. I might just have to rethink that idea. I am sure I can come up with something.
“One of the secrets of a happy life is continuous small treats,
and if some of these can be inexpensive and
quickly procured so much the better.”
~Iris Murdoch
I did have a nice birthday this week. I had a week filled with continuous small treats, beginning last Sunday with a pre-Birthday celebration at my sisters, with cards and gifts. And then all week long cards and gifts trickled in. I cannot complain. I have been loved very much. I did have a lovely facetime with Doug and my long haired boys, not on the day itself, but a day or so after. I so enjoyed that. And I got a Birthday card in the post just about every day this week. Oh my, but it is so nice to be thought of in such a way as to have someone want to spoil you with a card in the post. I was thrilled with each and every one of them. Truly.
I have always loved cards. I love sending cards and I love getting cards. Cards say "I care about you" in a special way. It takes a bit of effort to send a card to someone. I appreciate that effort. It means the world to me.
I save all of my cards. I have a small basket full of them now. I had to leave all of my older cards that I had saved through the years over in the U.K. when I left, but I am building a new collection. Every now and then I like to go through them and read them all over again. When I do my heart is filled with joy and I say a little prayer in my heart for the person who sent the card. So know, if you have ever sent me a card, I do pray for you.
Anyways, I had a week filled with continuous small treats. It was not bad turning 69 at all.
And with that I best leave you with a thought for the day. I am going shopping with my sister today and so I must be getting off here and getting ready. I am not sure what time she will want to go.
A thought to carry with you . . .
° * 。 • ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ •
•。★★ 。* 。
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˚ ˛ •˛•˚ */______/~\。˚ ˚ ˛
˚ ˛ •˛• ˚ | 田田 |門 ★
*When last daylight meets starlight,
Summer fields dream,
Lavender, larkspur and life.
~Cumulus Life M, Summer Fields
In The English Kitchen today . . .
Easy Cinnamon Peach Cobbler. Its a doddle really. Two basic ingredients plus a bit of butter, some cinnamon and some brown sugar. A quick and easy dessert for the weekend.
I hope you all have a beautiful weekend, filled with loads of nice things and maybe some continuous small treats! Be happy and be blessed, and don't forget!
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And I do too!
💐x
ReplyDeleteThank you! xoxo
DeleteI really enjoy your poems on Saturdays, think I've said that before. Nice to have some 1 on 1 time with your Dad, enjoyable. A lovely birthday week for you. Im sure you and Cindy will find some good things to buy on your shopping trip. Have a wonderful weekend, seems we are in for some rain.
ReplyDeleteIt was really special to have the 1 on 1 time for sure Linda! I did have a great week and as usual my sister and I greatly enjoyed each other's company yesterday! xoxo
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ReplyDeleteI agree wholeheartedly! I like to watch people I would want to be friends with in real life, people who bring a sense of comfort and warmth.
DeleteThank you so much Beth! What you see on my channel is reality for sure, lol I am unreservedly real. xoxo Thanks also Becky! Both of your comforts have encouraged me! xoxo
DeleteVery nice to have a dinner with just you and your dad...and simple food is nice. Who wants fancy all the time. Often my hubby and I talk about how some recipes are so strange looking one would be afraid to try them as you cannot identify what on earth food it is made from!! Heh, we like to be able to recognize such!!
ReplyDeleteElizabeth xoxo
To be honest Elizabeth, I cooked enough fancy in my years at the Manor to last me a lifetime! xoxo
DeleteHappy Belated Birthday! Hope you reorder your tea trolley soon! -- Madelyne, Victoria BC
ReplyDeleteThank you so much Madelyne! xoxo
DeleteMarie, everything you wrote about perfectionism rang so true for me, as well. I don't know about you, but when I look at Susan Branch's work or Mary Engelbreit's work, I find myself thinking, "If only I hadn't judged my initial efforts so harshly and had stuck with it." Because that was truly what I wanted to do with my life, either that or writing. And the other area where perfectionism takes a stranglehold is trying to lose weight! I must get rid of that "all or nothing" rigid thinking and just aspire to do BETTER.
ReplyDeleteI know what you mean about Susan's and Mary's work. I at one time strove to be as good as they are and always felt like I fell short. I wanted to be a writer also. I think we can certainly admire these people, but in the end we need to be ourselves, do our best, and know that practice makes perfect or at least as close to it as we can get and there is NO shame in that! xoxo
DeleteI love that Edna Jacques poem. It makes me wish I had thought to start making one when I was younger.
ReplyDelete