Monday, 9 May 2016
Small and Wonderful Things . . .
"The world is fairly studded and strewn with pennies cast broadside from a generous hand. But who gets excited by a mere penny?...It is dire poverty indeed when a man is so malnourished and fatigued that he won't stoop to pick up a penny. But if you cultivate a healthy poverty and simplicity, so that finding a penny will literally make your day, then, since the world is in fact planted with pennies, you have with your poverty bought a lifetime of days. It is that simple. what you see is what you get." ~Anne Dillard
A few of the small and wonderful things which bring untold joy into my life. It's the small things in life which truly mean the most. Simple abundance . . . it's the best.
Sunny days in England, with the warmth of the sun beating down on our heads, the birds singing, Mitzie gamboling all over the garden . . . just beautiful. I have always said there is no finer place to be on earth than in England on a sunny day. We've had some beautiful weather these past couple of days and it looks as if today is going to be another fine day. Hooray! Finally!
Although in all fairness it is the rainy days which make these sunny days all the more precious and this country so green, so I guess we must give credit where credit is due and be grateful for the rainy days as well!
This past weekend was our bi-annual Stake Conference and so we got to go and listen to lovely talks with our local leaders and Elder Clifford T Herbertson of the Area Seventy. Our Mission President and his wife were also there. It is always nice to see them and listen to them speak as well. We had to be there extra early yesterday morning as there was an additional session for new and returning members of the church and we were bringing a family that has recently begun coming back to church. What a blessing it was to be at that meeting, and to be able to share in the joy felt by all of these new and returning members, to listen to their stories and testimonies. The children's choir yesterday at the main session was amazing. To see all these children from the age of 3 up to 12 together in a group singing was very sweet . . . to feel of their enthusiasm for the Gospel and the Saviour, truly uplifting.
I will always, always be grateful for my membership of this church I go to. It is my family. It took me a very long time to find my spiritual home . . . years and years and years. I had thought I had found it several times in the past, but was always disappointed in the end to discover that I hadn't. From the moment I walked into one of our chapels, I felt a special something which I had never felt before in any other church. A special joy . . . a light . . . a spark. I cannot explain it, there are no words really, but I just felt like I had found what I had always been looking for. It spoke to my heart and my spirit like nothing else ever had. I love the people . . . they are not perfect, they know they are not perfect, they are humble and kind and loving . . . like me, they are imperfect people on a journey towards perfection, a journey filled with hope, and yes . . . joy. I love the Doctrines of this church. I love our leaders. I love everything about it. For me, finally finding it was like finally discovering the missing puzzle piece of a puzzle I had been trying to fit together for years and years. I know this is the Saviour's church and is good. Finding your spiritual home is always a really special and wonderful thing.
Getting to share all of this with my Todd. For years and years I prayed to have a husband who loved the Saviour as much as I did, thinking that one day my ex husband would finally be on the same page as myself. That never happened, but my prayers were answered and in the most amazing way. I had to go through a tiny bit of hell to get here, but the journey was worth every painful step because I have the most amazing husband ever. I love him with all of my heart. He loves me with all of his heart. And we both love the Saviour with equality. We are on the same page. That doesn't mean that he doesn't irritate me from time to time, or that I don't irritate him from time to time. That is all a part of life and of marriage, but . . . at the end of the day we are equally yolked, and that makes all the difference in the world. He is the yin to my yang.
Seeing your children as being good people and good partners and good parents . . . and knowing that you had at least a small part in that. Some of my children recognise that part, some do not. I hope and pray that one day they all will, but it is okay if they don't. I know I was a good mother. God knows I was a good mother. That is enough for me.
This was the first Mother's Day in a very long time that I didn't spend the whole day crying if not physically, then in my heart. Mourning even . . . I think I have finally come to the place where I can let it all go . . .
I think that my Mission has helped me to see that . . . not sure how or why, but it has. This is one of the blessings I have received from serving . . .
I look at these pictures of my children now, and I see happy faces.
I see that I was always a big part of their lives and I see the love. And even if they can't see it now, I know that one day they will.
And that is enough.
I have a patriarchal blessing which tells me that I am as a light on the hill to my family, and a letter from President Uchtdorf . . . an apostle of the Lord . . . which tells me that my Heavenly Father loves me and is mindful of the desires of my heart.
God's promises are true. I am not defined in the least by my worst days, but rather by my best. It is the adversary that would have me think otherwise.
A thought to carry with you through today . . .
"We all experience times
and seasons in our lives.
But whether we are at school,
at work, in the community,
or especially in the home,
we are the Lord’s agents
and we are on His errand."
~Carol F McKonkie
In The English Kitchen today . . . Apple and Blueberry Eve's Pudding.
May your week ahead be filled with an abundance of small and wonderful things! Don't forget . . .
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and I do too!