Tuesday 13 October 2020

Ahh . . . kindness . . .

  


You know, I was feeling pretty crummy this morning thinking about everything, about my life falling apart at the seams, about losing everything and then I got this comment on my English Kitchen blog on my Butter Fried Parsnips recipe:


OMG Nice recipe. but do you realize that the number of buildings housing banks and banks and acres of banks of computer servers we need for all of this is killing the planet? Instead of posting essentially the same picture of your parsnips 14 times, why don't you just pick ONE and leave it at that. Your post could be 2 pages long.

And please include a "Jump to Recipe" button at the top so we can quickly assess if this is the recipe we want without wading through endless paragraphs about your mum. Thank you. 

And I lost it. I am sitting here with tears running down my cheeks and my heart feels like it is going to be torn right out of my chest. Why are people so mean. 

And I wasted £70 of my savings on packing materials that I won't now be able to use  . . . I feel so, so, so down  . . . and its stupid.  They are just words from some nameless stranger.  They shouldn't matter.

24 comments:

  1. I would be happy to send some money to help you ship your most important things over to Canada, Marie. Maybe some in your family might be able to lend you some money for that too, if you prefer not to have online folks do so. I wonder too if the church might have a way to help out...much as they must do for other situations... Maybe a friend there could store a box or 2 of the most significant things, which you could send money for later, to be sent. Try not to let remarks left on your blogs bother you...and if they do, block the sender from further things. Hang in there...
    Sending much hugs and prayers, Elizabeth xoxo

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    1. Elizabeth, I am totally devastated. I cannot borrow money I cannot pay back. My church will probably pay for my plane ticket and they are covering my rent for November so I can get myself sorted. In all liklihood as of the 3rd of November I will have no income at all except what I can make off my food blog and that won't start until December. I think I have well and truly hit rock bottom, and none of it is my doing. None of it.

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    2. Today I feel truly and utterly broken. I don't think I have ever felt so low. Never.

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    3. All of this is so awful, Marie and I know no more than you state here...I do understand how someone can totally ruin another however...my daughter has barely made it under the extreme onslaught of her EX...the extent some will go in order to destroy others is simply beyond imagination!! But do not give up...keep your head up and continue walking with your head held high!! And surely there is a way some of us can GIVE you some help...we are all supposed to help others...I know it is hard to be on the receiving end...but that is the thing about life...one day, we get opportunities to give to others too and you would do that too I am sure!! I am the least qualified to set up a way to help you, being pretty illiterate on computers...but surely there are some here who can and will if you let them!!Meanwhile, I am sending up many prayers for your welfare!!
      HUGS, Elizabeth xoxo

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  2. The person who left that snarky comment is probably not a regular reader. He must have used a lot of resources to search for a parsnip recipe yet he complains how many resources you have used in posting the recipe. The best part of your recipes are the stories that go along with them. Scott, if you're reading this, shame on you. You owe Marie an apology. His comment has hit you hard due to your very vulnerable situation. Do not put any value on his comment, Marie. My heart is breaking for you. I'm going to try and come up with a plan to help. Love and hugs, Elaine

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    1. I believe this is the first time he ever commented, but I find myself wondering if that isn't the way everyone or most people feel. It just feels like I am being kicked when I am already down. Love and hugs, always. xoxo

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    2. Oh no Marie , I especially love the way you do your lovely English Kitchen Recipe Journal ! You absolutely dont take any notice of that nasty comment ..delete and block them and forget about it ! Hugs Debbie x

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  3. I read your blog all the time. It is a lovely, positive,heart warming place to be. Your writing draws one in and invites us to stay a while.
    I enjoy your Friday finds and your musings about the everyday
    Things going on in your life. The world is full of people
    who contribute nothing but misery and gloom.
    There will always be the light and the darkness my dear.
    You continue to spread warmth and light.
    I am praying for a resolution to your current situation.
    You know that no matter how overwhelming it all seems, your God is in control of all.
    I do wish you would let us, your online sisters help you.
    I'd love to send you something to assist you in this difficult time. Perhaps you could give us an address to send a card or note. Maybe we could all go on amazon and buy a copy of your book. We are here to help each other, please allow us this privilege.
    Take heart, this is but another season in your life,it to will pass. Hugs.

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  4. Good morning. Unkind words hurt. I am so sorry this happened to you. What you are going through is hard - you are an incredibly strong woman. I have enjoyed your blog for years, even though I don't often comment. You will be in my prayers today and as you go through this trial.

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  5. Satan is heavy at work and will do whatever can be done to destroy. Especially those that he knows are weak and struggling. The struggle is real and Satan is prepared to destroy if he can. YOU STAY STRONG! God is our strength and HE is ALL you need. Keep your Faith and your Trust in the Lord. As for as the person who sent that comment.....I would say shame on them for being such a selfish and uncaring person. Delete their comment and do not allow your mind to Gove them the joy of bringing you down. May God richly Bless you through all of this. You have many people praying for you, and the power of prayer is STRONG.

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  6. Listen up Scott..do you know how many years Marie has been sharing EXCELLENT recipes w/ all of us?I agree shame on you and your big mean critical mouth .
    You must be a great friend to many and vice versa.
    Not nice.
    Be KIND.

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  7. I shake my head at those who believe that leaving comments such as those are acceptable; that the internet makes them innominate. Despite what they may think, their opinion Does not matter. We never know what others are enduring so we must always try to be kind.
    You are going through so much right now and that comment was just the straw that broke the camels back. All things are temporary my dear, and as hard as this is, you’ve done hard before. It may not feel like it, but you will get through this. Sending you my love and gratitude for the hard work that I look forward to reading daily. You simply make my day better by being you. Sending my prayers and love.

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  8. It’s amazing to me that people can be so dreadful to others. Marie, you bring such joy. You’re a gift to many people and I hope in these times of difficulty you can remember that.
    Everything in life is temporary and as hard as this is, you can be sure you’ll get through it with God and the help of family and friends. I am sending you much prayer and love. Today and everyday.

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  9. Try to remember the good Lord never gives us more than we can handle. Keep the faith, things will work out for the best.

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  10. Hello Marie, I'm a long time reader but rarely comment. I am sorry for what you are going through!
    I'm probably late with this (you've probably thought of it already!) but may I humbly add that if it were me, it would give me a sense of control in all the chaos to use those packing materials and start packing up. If anything, I would be happy knowing that my items are somewhat safe/wrapped up.
    Hoping some of your friends there would be willing to keep at least a few of your things for you! Maybe to be sent once a month as you can!
    Best wishes for your future!

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  11. I am so sad that such a good,kind person as you has to be going through this. And shame on the person with the very unkind comment. Pay no mind!
    I agree with Savannah - let us help you, it would be a gift to us.
    Mary

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  12. Hello Marie. That unkind comment hit me hard too, I can’t even fathom why anyone would post such mean, unnecessary things . Please know your readers are behind you 100%. You provide so much goodness and light and inspiration to so many and we hope you continue to do so ...don’t let anyone change or stop you. Please focus on all the positive comments above. We appreciate you and your honesty, kindness, recipes, photos, insight and grace. Peace be with you. V.

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  13. Marie I’m so sorry to hear of your struggles this past while. You’re in my prayers and I’m concerned about you. Do you have a Venmo account? How can I help you? Waiting to hear back from you
    Much love to you
    Lenis mcDonald

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  14. Dear Marie
    I’m so sorry that you are having such hard and difficult struggles right now. I am praying for you and am concerned about you. I would like to help you anyway that I can. Do you have a Venmo account? I can help through that way. Please get back to me so I will know. Sending my love to you
    Lenis McDonald

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  15. Pay no attention to the unkind remarks. My guess is that this particular person spends all day leaving negative comments on all kinds of blogs. Some of the remarks other bloggers receive are down right vicious ,beyond mean spirited . Keep steadfast with your plans,don’t get derailed.

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  16. Dear Marie~

    I'm so sorry, I don't know why this person, Scott, felt like he should post something so mean, he must be a miserable human being. I have always loved everything you have posted, recipes, photos, art, all of it. Don't feel like you should change because of someone like, Scott. I wish he weren't anonymous, I would give him a piece of my mind!

    Keeping you in my prayers always. I will keep praying for an answer for you, and I know others are doing the same thing. Take one day at a time, one hour at a time, whatever you need to get you through. God is at the helm, He will direct you in all you do. Much love to you, Marie.

    Hugs,
    Barb



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  17. Hi Marie~

    I'm so sorry...I am always shocked at how many rude, human beings there are in the world. I pray that you will be able to see this for what it is, a miserable human who takes pleasure in being a bully.

    Just so you know, I love your, English Kitchen blog, I always have. I love that there is a story with every recipe, I love that! Please don't let this stop you from being you. Block this intolerable man, don't let his comment hurt you any further. Just continue on, be yourself, we have your back.

    God is at the helm, sweet friend. I will be praying for you to find answers. XOXO

    Hugs and Love,
    Barb

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  18. This is perhaps only the second time I've posted on your blog but I want to wish you well. You write beautifully about food and the things you love. It's obvious you have drive and determination. Whenever you do creative things there is always someone who feels the need to give unasked for critiques. Never mind that they are not creative themselves and would probably not have the stamina to write interesting blogs post on a daily basis. This man probably has no idea how much effort that takes. Your blog is quite an achievement and I have a lot of admiration for you.
    I do hope that these hurdles are overcome for you eventually but I have no doubt that you will continue to create lovely recipes, and great text. You have talent and your blog is head and shoulders above most of the other food blogs. It is hurtful to receive unfair comments and it's upsetting. I'm sorry that this happened at a low point for you.

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  19. Thank you everyone for your very kind comments and prayers. I am feeling very overwhelmed at the moment. I hope you will understand my not responding individually at this time. I am really sorry. xoxo

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Your comments mean the world to me, and while I may not be able to address each one individually, each one is important to me and each one counts. Thanks so much!