Saturday 29 June 2019

Saturday meanderings of the mind . . .


"Charity is having patience with someone who has let us down. It is resisting the impulse to become offended easily. It is accepting weaknesses and shortcomings. It is accepting people as they truly are. It is looking beyond physical appearances to attributes that will not dim through time. It is resisting the impulse to categorize others".
~Thomas S. Monson 


I saw this quote on a friend's face-book page the other day and it brought me up short.   It was as if it had been put there just for me, although I know that it hadn't, and only the Lord knows the struggles of my heart.

I try so hard not to judge others . . . but sometimes in a weak moment I am afraid that I do.  I sit in my chair and I mull over in my mind all of the what if's and why fore's and I  mentally argue with those who I feel have let me down, hurt my feelings, etc. I am much too non-confrontational to ever argue with a person face-to-face, but that doesn't stop me from arguing with them in my mind.  Its really a colossal waste of time . . .  sitting here having uncharitable thoughts about others and their perceived mis-deeds. Doesn't change a thing, except perhaps myself . . . I am getting better about it however, making progress and don't do it near as often as I used to do.  Perhaps one day soon, I will managed to purge my mind and heart of these things altogether . . .




What I really should be doing when those negative thoughts start to assail me, is hitting my knees and asking my Heavenly Father to forgive my easily offended heart . . . asking Him to help me to be more patient in my understanding and to heal my bruised feelings and heart.

In reality the offender doesn't have any idea that they have offended  . . . and if they do, or have done it on purpose, what is to be gained by negative thoughts or feelings??  Nothing really.  They have achieved their purpose in bringing you down and you have allowed them to get away with it.

I wonder . . . will I ever learn?  Sometimes it is an uphill battle, but I am getting better.   As my father would say, and often did . . . "You can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar." I am a work in progress.

If I am truly a student of the Master . . . I must strive harder to be the bigger person, and to always answer negativity with love. 



A book I recently re-visited after many years was Little Women, by Louisa May Alcott. It had been one of my favourite books when I was a girl.  I got a copy of it one year as a birthday gift from my parents and I fell in love with that sweet story and that era in time, with Meg, Jo, Beth and Amy . . .  and Marmee and their struggles, with their ability to rise above.  I think I really identified with Jo, and her desire to become a writer. I think perhaps inside each voracious reader is a tiny bit of a writer longing to come out of her shell . . .



One of the first versions I ever saw of it in film was the original one in Black and White with Margaret O'Brien in it aand a few other favourites of mine . . . I am sure it was well dated even when I saw it and Margaret already a grown woman.  I next saw it in the local base theatre in Gagetown, New Brunswick, the version with Winona Ryder and Susan Sarandon.   I fell in love with the film all over again, and it is one which we re-visit every Christmas season. A few years ago as well, they did another version from a slightly different angle that was on the television, and we recorded it.  I have kept that and we also re-visit it from time to time.   The story is a timeless classic which just never gets old. The heart wants what the heart wants  . . .  

I think that is because of the simple values it represents . . . love of God, home and family.  The value of hard work and honesty.  The ability to find joy in the every day.  As corny as that all may seem . . . is that not what all of us really want?  To feel valued, and loved and to have a purpose?  



Doggie snuggles . . .  I don't think I could live without them.  I think I will always want to have a dog.  I do believe that they truly are man's best friend.  Todd and I love this "little woman" so very much.  We were just saying last evening as she snuggled on the sofa between us that she is the loveliest dog either of us has ever had, so loving and loyal and gentle. My father says that she always looks sad  . . .  that is because of the eyes. In reality she is one very happy pooch. 

I had a facetime date with our Doug yesterday for a time.  All the boys were home, on school holidays they are now.  He is still doing well and is hoping to be allowed to drive again soon. They've already done some lovely days out with the children, he and Kayla. Just local things. He was saying that he remembers us always doing things with him and his siblings when they were growing up.  We tried to at any rate, even within our limited budget.  Even if it was only treating them to a drive through the local car-wash.  Oh what a fiasco we had with that one time!

We (my ex and I) never had much money so we always drove old clunkers. We decided to treat the children to a trip through the car wash one Saturday morning. We thought that they would think it was a great adventure, and it was . . .  until we got right into it and those big brushes started advancing across the car with the squirting water and soap, etc.  Our Eileen was terrified of it and started screaming at the top of her lungs . . .  continuously through the whole experience.  There was nothing I could do to comfort her or to get her to stop. Longest 10 minutes of our lives.  We had grossly misjudged the appeal of a car wash in the mind of a developmentally challenged child.  We both heaved huge sighs of relief when it was over and our car was pushed out the other end.

But the adventure wasn't over yet.  

As we started to  motor down Highbury Avenue, back to the safety of our home, I remember hearing a distinct flapping noise coming from the back of the car, kind of like a flag in the wind, or a large bird flapping its wings.  As I looked back towards the rear of the car I could see our vinyl roof hanging by a thread, fluttering in the breeze via our rear view window.  Talk about the Beverly Hillbillies.  We can all laugh about it now.  Thank goodness.  I guess that is a vital truth in life . . .  the things which might cause you momentary discomfort at the present,  you will one day be able to look back and laugh about. Moments in time, memories being built, a family's together-history that is shared with nobody else on earth. 

A thought to carry with you  . . .


° * 。 • ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ •
•。★★ 。* 。
° 。 ° ˛˚˛ * _Π_____*。*˚
˚ ˛ •˛•˚ */______/~\。˚ ˚ ˛
˚ ˛ •˛• ˚ | 田田 |門 ★

 *
"God has two dwellings, 
one in heaven and the other
 in a meek and thankful heart."
~unknown  •。★★ 。* 。 


Red, White & Blue Baked Alaskas 


In The English Kitchen today  . . .  Red, White & Blue Baked Alaskas.  Simple.


Have a great Saturday!  We are in for a nice sunny and warm day!  Don't forget! 


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And I do too! 





6 comments:

  1. "I am much too non-confrontational to ever argue with a person face-to-face, but that doesn't stop me from arguing with them in my mind." -- That is soooo me.

    Funny story about the car wash! I'm 69 years old and still uneasy when Tom pulls into the car. So glad your Doug is doing well!

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  2. I remember either loving a car wash..and hating it..something claustrophobic about them;) I hand wash.
    That's why I love my tiny car;)
    You re a better person than I am..once bitten twice shy ..thrice buh bye.
    Believe me..people know what they are doing..in 90% of the cases.
    I got fed up with the stupid drama..and selfishness..Doesn't sound like me right? Well Jacques reinforced the facts and ..he was right.:)
    I still harbor ill feelings.
    And probably always wiil.

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  3. Perhaps what you describe is just the difference between being an empathetic person or someone without an ounce of sympathy or empathy in their body? You are very concerned for others, Marie...so many are not. A couple years ago, it came to light that I was the victim of a sociopath...my they are so clever!! We were moving in order to help our daughter soon after (my was that a welcome move!!) and I was so thankful GOD provided that way of escape (so we never had to tell anyone else of what this person had done to us). But it has made me very much into more of a hermit...even if my life was at a point I had time to attend or join another group, I am simply not ready. You see, this took place in our place of worship...something that makes it ever harder to get over. Maybe we are not meant to get over extreme betrayals. Why should we put ourselves in a place to have it done to us again? I am not sure I would live through another such event. It affected me physically too. I do understand too, how it is when those who neglect us are our kids...another situation entirely. Terribly hard to know what to do...well, sending hugs and empathy. So glad your Doug is doing better!!
    Elizabeth xoxo

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    1. How frightening that must have been for you Elizabeth! I cannot imagine! I agree, being abandoned by your own children is incredibly heart breaking. Words cannot ever begin to describe it. Love and hugs to you! xoxo

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  4. I always relish your down to earth thoughts on life. Today was a masterpiece. We all are a work in progress as far as judging and forgiving. I have had to come to peace with this several times in my life and I am now finding out an easier way to manage it all. I gave a talk in church recently on forgiveness and perhaps sometime, I will post some thoughts from it.
    I too loved reading and enjoying the story of :Little Women" It is the best and one of my all time favorites.
    I'm so happy that you had a beautiful moment with your Doug. I am happy he is doing well. That can be such a scare for a young man his age. Remember, my husband had a heart attack at 45 years old.
    I love your sweet dog's face; I can tell he is an endearing pet.
    Sending loving thoughts and hugs your way!

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    Replies
    1. 45 was very young also LeAnn! How very scary that must have been for you all. Mitzie is our sweetheart for sure. We love her so much! Love and hugs to you and Roger! xoxo

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