Wednesday Witterings . . .

 

 

(source)

I'm really late getting on here this morning. It was very close to 7 before I woke up. I have been waking up a lot later lately. Not sure if it is because of the time change or not. In any case, I must need the sleep or I wouldn't be sleeping. DUH That made sense eh?

Today is my wedding anniversary.  When Todd and I got married I picked November 11th as the day so he would never forget our anniversary. (Remembrance Day is usually celebrated on the Sunday before the 11th in the UK, unless the 11th happens to fall on a Sunday.)  I also wanted to make the 11th of November a happy memory instead of the one it had always been  . . .  that of a husband rolling home drunk and combative after having spent a day drinking with his buddies. I remember thinking that it would be nice to have it be a day that had nicer connotations attached to it. Well, now . . . .  it really is a day that I have difficulty with, having cemented that with my folly.

Oh well  . . . I couldn't have known.

 

(source)

Its very quiet in here this morning. Eileen is still sleeping. She said last night that she was going to have a pajama day today. I've showered and dressed, fed the cats and am now sitting here with Frank Sinatra playing on the laptop accompanying me as I write. I've been listening to Frank a lot lately. I enjoy him along with Michael Bublé. I find their music to be quite calming and reflective. 

I can remember seeing old cartoons when I was a child where all of the stars of the 1940's would be characterized and "Frankie" being one of them. Of course as a child I had no idea of who he was.  

 

 

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 I put an end to that relationship that was developing with that guy on IG earlier this week. To be honest he was a bit of a nutter, but he did make me laugh and appealed a bit to that side of any woman who likes to feel that she is desirable by someone.  I decided to tell him about Todd in an attempt to explain to him why I was leery of developing a relationship with anyone online, and he didn't take it very well. I am not sure if he thought I was making it up or what, or if he thought it was impossible that I couldn't have known. To be honest I cannot blame him for thinking such a thing. I have family members who feel the same way. In any case, I decided that it wasn't worth the trouble and after he woke me up texting me 1:30 in the morning one night I decided to delete and block him. 

It has left me thinking however  . . .  I have, at the very least, 20 years of my life that I am always going to have difficulty explaining to people, and most people are not going to "get it" or be able to understand it. It's like a huge vacuum space that I have nothing to fill with. People who have known me for a very long time know that's not who I am, or at least they should do, but I can't expect others not to accept me at face value.  I don't think I am going to actively pursue being with anyone at all.  I will just have to let other things fill the space that my heart longs to have filled with someone who cares. It is what it is and there's nothing I can really do about it.

There is that guy here in town that I kind of fancy. We are friends on Facebook and were at school together,  but again  . . . I would probably have to have some sort of explanation for things and I am not going there again.

 

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"I carry both grace and grit. One teaches me when to bend;

the other reminds me not to break."

~L.T. Khoarai

The years have taught me that resilience isn't always found in pushing harder. Sometimes it's found in knowing when to soften, when to forgive, when to let go and when to stand firm. 

Life requires both. The grace to be gentle with ourselves and others. The grit to keep going when the road becomes difficult. Neither is weakness. Together they are strength.

Both are gifts. Both are necessary. Both live within each of us.  Grace and grit. A beautiful balance for the journey. 

 

(source)

Because today is a holiday here in Nova Scotia, we decided to have our family dinner out yesterday. The restaurant that dad likes to go to was going to be closed today.  I also knew that Eileen would be disappointed if we missed it. She really looks forward to those meals out.  They had a Two for One dinner special on.  You could either get the Haddie Bits or Cheeseburgers. 

We all got Cheeseburgers. They came with Frings and were supposed to come with coleslaw as well, but it never appeared. We were surprised also that it was one order of Frings to be divided between two people. (Frings are onion rings and French fries, together.) It does make it a bit awkward.  I didn't want much of either one, but you got a small bread plate with a burger on it and a basket holding the Frings, that you would then have to divide between the two people. Not a problem for me and Eileen, but a bit of a problem for Dad and Cindy. 

Cindy handled it by putting her burger on her napkin and her share of the Frings on the plate. I never thought of doing that myself. I just put some of the Frings on my plate with the burger. I knew I wasn't going to want to eat many of them anyways.

In any case we muddled through it, but I don't think I would ever go for the Two Can Dine deal again.

It was very quiet in there last night though, which I didn't mind. Its usually quite noisy which makes it difficult to speak to one another.  Dad had a piece of cherry pie for dessert and Eileen had an ice cream sundae which she really enjoyed. I do so love to make her happy.

She will be back at her own place next Monday. I will miss her.

Well, I don't have a lot else to share this morning. Its a dull day out and quite cool. I don't expect we will be going anywhere. It's gone 9 a.m. and I do have to be getting on with other things, so . . . 

A thought to carry with you  . . . 

☾ ° ★° * 。  

• ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ • •。★★ 。* 。
° 。 ° ˛˚˛ * _Π_____*。*˚
˚ ˛ •˛•˚ */______/~＼。˚ ˚ ˛
˚ ˛ •˛• ˚ ｜ 田田 ｜門 ★

*Nothing shows

a man's character more

than what he laughs at.

~Goethe

 

I made this delicious supper for Eileen and I on Monday. Pork Chops with Cranberry Sauce and Stuffing.  Not only was it quick and easy to make, but it was very delicious. I will make this again. I think you could also do it with chicken and it would be lovely.

I hope you have a great day.  Remembrance Day here. The day we remember those who gave up their lives in service to our great country.  Whatever you get up to today, don't forget!

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⊰✿░G░O░D⊰✿⊰L░O░V░E░S⊰✿⊰░Y░O░U░⊰✿

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And I do too!    

   

Wednesday Witterings . . .

 

(source)

 I was awake really early this morning, although I didn't get out of bed until my normal time. That's what the time change does to me. It really messes up my internal clock and it takes me days to get myself sorted. It messes with Nutmeg's internal clock too. He is so funny. These last few days he has taken to sitting next to me at the computer while I am working about an hour before their lunch meal and he bats me every few minutes and meows, trying to get my attention I suppose. I am ignoring him for as long as I can, but it's not easy. He is very persistent.

My cleaners ended up not coming yesterday as one of them was not feeling well and she didn't want to bring any germs or viruses into my house, especially with Eileen recovering. That was quite thoughtful I thought. They have rescheduled for later in the day on Thursday. 

I know I could probably do all the cleaning myself, but ... it's not that I am lazy, but I have so many other things I need to do if I can afford to have someone do it for me, then that's what I want. To me its worth every penny and I love the way my house smells and feels afterwards. I'm really picky with my bathroom and they keep it sparkling. That's important to me.

 

(source)

I'm not sure if I told you already or not, but we have missionaries back here now. Missionary Sisters.  Sister Marshall and Sister Wendt. Very nice young ladies. It's been a few years since we had missionaries here.  They messaged me yesterday morning asking me if I would go out teaching with them last night. They had two appointments. One at 6 and one at 6:30 right here in town. I said I would go, even though, to be honest, I don't like driving after dark. My cataracts make it hard for me to see properly.

The 6:30 one ended up canceling though so it was just the 6:00 one. I drove there and so did the sisters but the person ghosted us. It happens. Its a bit of a shame though when it does. 

Anyways, I was glad that I had taken myself out of my comfort zone to go with them.  Hopefully there will be more opportunities for me to do so. I am sure that there will be.

 

(source)

You may or may not have noticed that there are a lot of post services being offered nowadays. Post services that you can subscribe to where you will get a letter, etc. each month to inspire you and cheery you up.  I watch this girl on YouTube, Jennilee of The Pioneer Home. I love her videos. They are so calming and inspirational.  She has a mail club, The Pioneer Post. I had subscribed back the first of August. But, I never got anything, so I contacted her. My address was correct, etc.  So she resent them and they were lovely little letters, with postcards, recipe cards, and a lovely newsy letter. Quite nice. I have often thought of doing something the same myself, but I don't even know how to go about it. Where to get the stuff printed, etc. It bears looking into I think. I write here every day anyways. It would not take much more of an effort for me to do a mail out newsletter, and I think I would enjoy it.

What are your thoughts?

 

(source)

I've thought a lot about sending my daughter her birthday card or not. Thanks for your input.  I don't think you can ever go wrong by doing the right thing, and the right thing would be for me to send it, whether she cares or not. At least then I will have done the right thing and nobody can accuse me of not doing so. My sister thinks I should sign it Marie, lol  I don't know about that. It is tempting, but then would it really be the right thing?  I don't know  . . . 

 

(source)

Its very dark out there this morning, with leaden skies and a light rain falling.  I am not complaining, it will be snow soon enough. I have to go out and break down all my garden things, take the teeth out of the pumpkin to give back to Dan, dump the worn out geraniums, etc. 

Get ready for winter. Its that time of year.  

The other day Zillah dropped off two Halloween cupcakes and treats for Eileen and myself. I just looked over at the table and mine is still sitting there. Eileen ate hers and enjoyed it. I will probably give her mine as well. I just can't bring myself to eat it.  I know it is delicious, but I've been doing really well staying away from things like that. I suppose there is a part of me that is scared that if I open the door even just a crack I will let the flood in, and . . . I don't want to do that.

 

(source)

Emotionally this is a difficult week for me.  It's been six years ago on Saturday that I arrived back here in Canada, so broken. I have come so far since then, and I am proud of myself. I was thinking back on the journey. It's hard not to. The way I saw the geese flying overhead the night before I left to come back, etc. So many signs that I was doing the right thing.  And I can say in retrospect that it was definitely, absolutely the right thing for me to do.

And now, here I am . . .  if not thriving,  very close to it. I feel solid emotionally and I am happy with my life. I do have lots of joy in it. I am so grateful that I have been able to be here for Eileen. I was thinking about it in bed last night. God's timing. Eileen and I were always close.  It's a different kind of mother/daughter relationship because of her learning disability, but it's a beautiful relationship. We don't connect on some levels but we connect on all the ones that matter most.  She is my best friend, and these last 10 months have been really special ones for both of us. We do laugh a lot.  I am very proud of her. She has come through some very heavy things and done so with a smile on her face and loads of courage.

I feel like Esther in the Bible  . . .  being led here to this . . . for this moment. 

I am learning to dwell on my blessings rather than my losses. Oh, for sure the losses will always be there and they bring with them a certain amount of heartache, but, I can live with them. I remember one day when I was still in the U.K. . . .  I could feel my youngest two pulling away from me and I thought to myself I will never be able to handle this. I thought in that moment that my heart was going to break into a million pieces and never recover from the pain of it all. I really felt like I might lose my mind. Its a funny pain to describe, and I don't mean ha ha funny. Anyways at that time I never thought that I would get to the point where I could live with it. But somehow you learn to live with it, and while it does always hurt, you teach yourself not to let the hurt from it dominate your life. Those "I think I will go crazy from the pain of it" moments become fewer and fewer. 

When what you always thought was unimaginable becomes real, you just have to learn to live with it, or you will be destroyed from it and I have learned that my spirit is far too strong to allow that to happen.

 

(source)

Isn't this a happy photograph. It makes me smile.

Not a lot on my books today. I want to do a bit of cooking and picture taking and some writing. Then later on Eileen and I are going out to supper with Cindy and Dad. Hazel won't be there from now until the clocks move ahead in the spring. We are going to go to DeeDee's before it closes for the Winter.  Eileen has been dreaming of her Mushroom Bacon Melt Burger all week. haha I am not sure what I will have. Maybe fish and chips. I enjoyed the ones we had there before. Their special today is the Haddie Bits however (like fish nuggets). I am not really fond of those, at least I haven't been. I may just break habit and get them this time. In any case, I am looking forward to it.

And with that I will close this off now and leave you with a thought for the day . . . 

☾ ° ★° * 。  

• ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ • •。★★ 。* 。
° 。 ° ˛˚˛ * _Π_____*。*˚
˚ ˛ •˛•˚ */______/~＼。˚ ˚ ˛
˚ ˛ •˛• ˚ ｜ 田田 ｜門 ★

*No one belongs to you.

Everything is an experience.

Sometimes, love means

letting go.

This spoke to me this morning . . . 

In The English Kitchen today  . . .  Deli Style Roast Beef Sandwich. I made this for Eileen the other day and she loved it.  She actually took it with her to Tim Hortons. (Not sure what they think of this kind of thing, but nobody ever says anything.) I like these Naan Sandwich Breads. They make a great sandwich! 

I hope you have a beautiful Wednesday.  I hope the rain goes off here. It's coming down fairly heavy at the moment. Time will tell.  Anyways, be happy, stay safe, be blessed, don't forget!

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⊰✿░G░O░D⊰✿⊰L░O░V░E░S⊰✿⊰░Y░O░U░⊰✿

═══════════ ღೋƸ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒღೋ ════════════  

And I do too!    

   

Wednesday Witterings . . .

 

(source)

 Brrr . . .  it's -2*C/28*F . . . a chilly morning. The frost will most surely be on the pumpkins this morning.  I found myself awake at about quarter to six this morning, much earlier than I have been waking up lately. I just lay there lost in thought and grateful for having been given a new day for a few minutes before I actually crawled out of bed.  My days have been full and so busy lately, that it was nice to have the luxury of a few thinking minutes before my day started in earnest.

I was on Instagram later in the day yesterday as Eileen and I were watching television, and this reel came up of this old guy singing and dancing.  I thought he was funny so I commented one word, "foxy" on his reel. We ended up having a whole conversation. It probably lasted a good half hour or so before I said goodbye. (always leave them wanting more) 

He said he wanted to be famous. I told him fame was a double edged sword. It seems everyone and their dog wants to be famous these days. Nobody seems to be content with just being themselves. As for me, I wouldn't touch fame with a ten foot pole. Not for me.

 

(source)

Eileen and I have been enjoying warm apple cider evenings as the temperatures cool down and the nights turn long. There is something quite comforting about sitting there sipping a hot mug of it while we watch television. She with her diamond art (Yes! She is back sitting up and doing it again, comfortably.) and I with my crochet hook and yarn.  Two cats nuzzled in next to me, one at my head and the other at my side. These are comforting evenings.

We have been making Christmas plans. We have decided that on Christmas Eve we are going to have a finger food buffet instead of supper with little sausage rolls, and crackers and cheese, pickles, fruit and crisp veggies . . . eggnog . . .  and we are going to start celebrating mid-afternoon.  We will watch the nativity and Charlie Brown's Christmas and whatever else comes up before ending the day with A Christmas Story. And we will exchange one tiny fun gift. Something to put a smile on the face before bed, and Santa.

It is nice to be making plans for a positive future. 

 

(source)

I went out to check my mail later in the afternoon yesterday after Eileen got back. (Yes, she went out again for a short time yesterday afternoon. There will be no stopping her now.)  I hadn't noticed that Cindy was picking up Bailey from Sheila's so I stopped by the car to say hi to Dad on my way back from the mailbox. I hadn't seen him for a few weeks. Not wanting to leave Eileen on her own I haven't been venturing very far from the house, and of course his mobility is very limited. It was nice to see him.  I told him that we would probably be able to join everyone at the Big Scoop this week for supper (tonight) and he seemed happy about that.  Eileen and I have already decided what we want. But, knowing us, it will probably change a few times before we actually get there. Eileen is really looking forward to it, and, in all honesty, so am I.

It will be nice to be together as a family again and to see Hazel for one last time. With the time change this weekend, she will stop coming out on Wednesday night as she doesn't like to drive after dark and I cannot say that I blame her.

 

(source)

It is hard to believe that in just a few days the trick-or-treaters will be knocking at the door. We get quite a few here where I live. These two streets (mine and the next one over) are very safe and you can travel between them via a safe little sidewalk which joins the two, going past the community gazebo and fountain. All elderly folk who like to see the children with their costumes and hand out treats. Eileen is looking forward to handing out treats. I am happy to let her do it. 

I really love seeing the children in their costumes and many of the parents dress up as well. Its just a nice evening.

I can remember trick-or-treating when I was a child. Our mother wouldn't let us go out until it was dark and we had eaten a good supper. Other kids would be out there already and I can remember being afraid that people would run out of candy. There were a lot more kids going out and about in those days and the fear of running out of candy was very real. The later you got out the riskier it was. Last year I had someone at my door around 4 p.m. which was rather early, but if you have a neurodiverse child it is best to take them when there are not a lot of other children around and the excitement is more controllable.  I don't know if this was a neurodiverse child, but am just guessing. 

This was not something which was really common back in the day. If people were neurodiverse it wasn't spoken about.  Now they have dedicated shopping hours in the stores and everything so that people with that condition can shop more comfortably. I think that's nice.  I rather like those hours as well. Much quieter and calmer.

 

(source)

Eileen got a lovely card and note in the post yesterday from my friend Ginny (Tea Cozy knitter) and her husband Tom. Included was a Susan Branch recipe for a delicious cake that Eileen and I have plans to make together one day.  She also got a lovely little package, card and note from Renee in Ohio.  A sweet colouring book filled with positive messages. She wanted me to be sure to say thankyou for her.  She really appreciated them and being thought of, also all the prayers of everyone. She has felt them and appreciates each and every one. So have I. Thank you.

She is going out this afternoon with one of her workers to pick up her hearing aids. I told her darn, I won't have any more secrets from you, lol  Now you will hear everything. She laughed at that. Apparently they are pink.  That is her favourite colour.

When she got married her colours were pink and black. She had the cutest pink slipper shoes with rhinestones on them. They were so pretty. She was very pretty as well. Brides always are.  Pretty and filled with hope.

She's still pretty. She has the clearest skin. Like porcelain. She has lost 21 pounds, and is feeling good about that, and has plans to continue to lose weight once she has healed properly.  She is wanting to go to gym nights again, which is good. She hasn't gone for the last several years. It is good to hear her making positive plans.

I don't really have a lot else to say this morning. Having looked out the window the frost is definitely on the pumpkin and I guess I best get on with my day. The guinea fowl are still visiting and I did see the chipmunk yesterday, but he will soon be going to ground as well.  

Life is good.

A thought to carry with you  . . . 

☾ ° ★° * 。  

• ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ • •。★★ 。* 。
° 。 ° ˛˚˛ * _Π_____*。*˚
˚ ˛ •˛•˚ */______/~＼。˚ ˚ ˛
˚ ˛ •˛• ˚ ｜ 田田 ｜門 ★

*Halloween is not only about putting
on a costume, but it's about finding the
imagination and costume within ourselves.
~Elvis Duran 

In The English Kitchen today,  Roast Pork with Lemon & Potatoes. There is fennel in there as well, The whole dish has a very Mediterranean feel to it. This was simple to make and very delicious.

I hope you have a lovely day today. It is going to be bright, sunny and cool here. The perfect day. Whatever you get up to, I hope it brings you joy! Don't forget!

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⊰✿░G░O░D⊰✿⊰L░O░V░E░S⊰✿⊰░Y░O░U░⊰✿

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And I do too!    

   

Wednesday Witterings . . .

 

 

(source)

Isn't this just the cutest little kitten. It reminds me a bit of my Nutmeg when he was a kitten. Similar, but not. Here is a photo of him  . . . 

Actually, now that I look at it, Nutmeg was cuter. But then again I am more than a bit biased. Last night he was laying next to me on the sofa and he was snoring. I said to Eileen I wish you had your hearing aids so that you could hear this.  You would love it. 

It really is the sweetest sound. He lays there next to me, with one paw on my knee and Cinnamon lays on the soft right behind my head with one paw stretches out towards me.  I think they must love me or something.

 

(source)

I had a pretty good time on my respite visit yesterday.  I did manage to fill the time. Will came to be here with Eileen and they watched Hocus Pocus and he told bad dad jokes and I went out for two hours on my own. First I went to Spurs Farm Market and had a boo around there. Tuesday is always bakery day and so I nabbed a fresh loaf of olive sour dough and two of those jam filled Breton cookies we enjoy, plus they have their Sweet Tart Apples (the ones with the red flesh) and I got a 1 QT basket of those to make some applesauce or something. (They make the best applesauce.) That olive sourdough is so good. I don't even need to put butter on it. I just tear off a chunk and eat it as it is. It is so delicious.

After that I went to the Independent Grocery store here in town. I had a good boo around. I haven't had a good thorough walk through a grocery store in a while. I got a few bits, and collected some stamps to give my sister for the knives they are selling with stamps. They didn't have the cat food I was wanting however so I went to the other grocery store and walked around there. I got some of those yogurt pots that Eileen and I like, with the fresh fruit and the granola in them, and I got Eileen a strawberry milk and then I got my cat food, had another bit of a wander around and then it was near enough time for me to go home. I was going to go up to Peltons, but I had spent enough money for one day by then so didn't.

It was nice to get out though.

This made me laugh this morning. Mom always had the radio on in the mornings. Most of the time we didn't pay real attention to it. We just kind of ate our breakfasts, and the music would be playing in the background, maybe Art Linkletter and Kids say the Darndest Things, a bit of news.  But on a snowy day, we were glued, hoping to hear that school was being cancelled. I don't know why it was so exciting to me, because I actually really enjoyed school, but there was always something really exciting about having an extra day off, a freebie as it were.

There was a sliding hill not too far from where our house was situated that we called Texaco Hill because there was a Texaco Filling station right across the road.  We would spend most of that day sliding down the hill on big pieces of cardboard, crazy carpets, flying saucers, sleds, etc. Whatever we could get our hands on. The hill would be loaded with kids all enjoying the pleasures of a fresh snow fall and an extra day off! Those were the days.

We would come back home from the end of it all with pink cheeks and noses, our breath huffing through the air, exhausted and played out. Snow days were never a disappointment.

 

(source)

Eileen and I were really pleased to note that Netflix now has Bewitched, the old television series, on it now. We have been enjoying it. It was such a good show.  I always loved seeing Samantha's clothes when I was a girl and their home always seemed to be so luxurious to me. Plus the idea of being able to just twitch your nose to do things and get things, well that was pure magic.  Then there is the love story of Samantha and Darin.  It was just a good, good show, and it still is.

We've also been enjoying Mad About You and Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman.

Eileen was feeling a lot better yesterday and has been doing more for herself. She is still sleeping a lot however.  Last night she thought she might be ready to go to the Big Scoop today, but then this morning when I had her up to go to the loo, she thought maybe she wasn't quite ready, which is absolutely fine. She spends much of her waking time in the lazy boy as she says it hurts too much to sit on a proper chair. She might try it for a bit today however as she is missing her diamond art. She did eat a bit more yesterday as well, which was good.

All told, I see small improvements each day. She is not really in a lot of pain now that I can see. Mostly just when she goes to the bathroom. There is a lot of bruising down there as well, which really surprised me.  I had not expected that, but then I really didn't know what to expect. Most of the dressings from the incisions have fallen off, which is to be expected and they look clean and healed, which is good. 

I do get her up to walk every hour when she is up. She uses the walker and this week has been walking for 10 minutes at a time. She seems to enjoy it, which is good.  Yesterday Zillah, my next door neighbour on the right side brought her over a card which really pleased her also.

So all is looking well on the Eileen front. I am so grateful. She is now thinking that maybe in another two weeks, perhaps after Halloween she will be ready to go into her own apartment, but we will see.

 

(source)

A lot of the leaves are coming down now. The tops of the trees are looking quite bare with stick arms reaching up into the sky and leaves dancing up and down the street with every puff of wind. The skies have been a brilliant blue however and it is hard not to be happy when you look at them. I am sure they are not any bluer than they are at any other time of the year, but the leaf colour and baring branches just make the blue seem more intense.

We have had a mild frost every morning this week, and my heat has been on pretty much all of the time. Well, the heat pump at any rate. I am so grateful for my heat pump. It keeps me toasty warm, without being over the top.

 

(source)

My cleaners were here yesterday as well. In the morning.  They always do such a nice job and it smells so fresh in here.  I had bought a new shower curtain and liner so they put that up for me and changed Eileen's bed for me in addition to their other chores. I know they are being paid, but those are not things on their regular list and so I really do appreciate their kindness in doing them for me. I have been saving up some money to give them in their Christmas Cards once Christmas rolls around as a special thankyou for them. There is the option of adding a tip when their company sends their invoice out each time, but I am not sure if they really get that money or not, or if the company takes some of it, so I would rather just give them some money in a card at Christmas as a special thanks for all that they do.

I really do appreciate them, plus they are quite amenable and pleasant. That makes a difference. I like them.

I was  cleaner once upon a time and I know how hard it is. When my kids were really small and we were living in Alberta (I only had the three at the time.) I cleaned the offices on the base and the schools at night with another guy. That was really hard work. I also cleaned houses for inspection for people that were moving out. White glove inspections. That was super hard work. The stoves were always a real chore.  They had to be pristine. I remember doing the base Doctor's house and taking out two buckets of sludge from his stove. I don't think it had ever been cleaned. 

Talk about hard work.

 

(source)

Because we moved so much with my husband being in the Military, it wasn't possible for me to have a "career." I was always doing something however, to bring some extra income into the home. Cleaning, typing, child minding and a host of other things. Always.  I suppose that is why it hurts my feelings when those two of my kids say I never did anything for them. 

Never mind. I do have three children who love and appreciate me.  I had a lovely facetime with Doug at the weekend. He was making chili with Josh. Josh is grinding his own flour now. Using a mortar and pestle. Talk about hard work!

I got to see Jon as well. Jake was still in bed.

Well, I have exhausted about all I have to say today so I will make an end to this now. Life is very good and I thank God daily for all of my blessings. I am a very blessed woman.

A thought to carry with you  . . . 

☾ ° ★° * 。  

• ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ • •。★★ 。* 。
° 。 ° ˛˚˛ * _Π_____*。*˚
˚ ˛ •˛•˚ */______/~＼。˚ ˚ ˛
˚ ˛ •˛• ˚ ｜ 田田 ｜門 ★

*Don't watch the clock;

do what it does. Keep going.

Sam Levenson

In The English Kitchen today  . . .  French Onion Cottage Pie. There are few things more comforting on a chilly autumn day than a bubbling, golden cottage pie fresh from the oven, and this French onion cottage pie just might be my favourite version yet! With lovely chunks of melt in the mouth tender beef in a rich gravy with a beautiful crispy edged fluffy Parmesan mashed potato thatch on top. This is excellent. 

I hope that you have a lovely Wednesday. It will be a quiet one here. A bit of work, a bit of play, a lot of love.  Whatever you get up to, I hope it brings you joy!  Don't forget! 

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⊰✿░G░O░D⊰✿⊰L░O░V░E░S⊰✿⊰░Y░O░U░⊰✿

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And I do too!    

   

Wednesday Witterings . . .

 

 

(source)

I don't know how this keeps happening, but tomorrow pretty much marks the middle of the month of October. Once again the pages are slipping off the calendar as quickly as quick can be.  Mind we have had a lot to contend with this month so it really shouldn't be surprising.

Eileen was really uncomfortable yesterday. My heart breaks to see her feeling the way that she does. Its the stitches down below that are causing her so much pain. I helped her to go to the loo first thing this morning and she said it didn't seem quite as bad as yesterday, but it's still bad. There are no pain killers left now so it's Tylenol all the way. Lets hope it helps to ease the discomfort a bit.

I read through her medical papers last night to see if I was missing something, looking up some of the terms on Google. Stage one Endometrial cancer, which is good because that means it was caught early.  They removed everything including the ovaries, fallopian tubes, uterus and did something to the lymph glands. I am surprised  that she is not in more pain than she is to be honest.

I am so proud of my girl. She is being so brave through all of this. Never a complaint or a whine, just a quiet "I wish this was all over." If I could take it all from her I would.

Needless to say we will not be going to the Big Scoop this week. She had hoped that she would be able to go to Tim Hortons a few times this week, but that's not going to happen either. It will in time. Just not yet.

 

(source)

Its a rainy day out there today. just light at the moment. I am not sure how much heavier it will get but it promises to be cool today as well. I had my heat on for a little bit yesterday. And I will no doubt put it on for a little bit today. I have to say, however, my place seems to hold the heat well. Being the middle unit I am protected on either side of me so only get wind when it is coming from the front or the back. A great blessing for sure.

 

(source)

Moonlit Apples

At the top of the house the apples are laid in rows,

And the skylight lets the moonlight in, and those

Apples are deep-sea apples of green. There goes

A cloud on the moon in the autumn night.

A mouse in the wainscot scratches, and scratches, and then

There is no sound at the top of the house of men

Or mice; and the cloud is blown, and the moon again

Dapples the apples with deep-sea light.

They are lying in rows there, under the gloomy beams;

On the sagging floor;  they gather the silver streams

Out of the moon, those moonlit apples of dreams,

And quiet is the steep stair under.

In the corridors under there is nothing but sleep,

And stiller than ever on orchard boughs they keep

Tryst with the moon, and deep is the silence, deep

On moon-washed apples of wonder.

~John Drinkwater (1882 - 1937)

I thought I would share this poem with you. I loved it and I thought you might as well. What a talent it is to be able to string words together in such a way as you paint a picture in the eyes and heart of another being with just them . . . and nothing else.

 

(source)

We had a visit from the Sister Missionaries on Monday.  This is the first time we have had Missionaries here in our area for a couple of years now. Eileen really enjoyed their visit. The girls bring a slightly different spirit with them than the boys do. One of them has not long since begun her mission and the other is only a month or so away from finishing hers. It was really nice to have them in my home. I promised them a recipe for sour dough bread so I best do that today. I am not sure if they have a sour dough starter or not. But it wouldn't surprise me if they did.

I have not begun a starter here. I had a good one working when I was still in the U.K. and I even had jars of dried starter that I could reactivate, but I was afraid to bring them with me because of customs, etc. From time to time I toy with the idea of starting a new one, but I never get past the toying stage. I don't have a lot of space to keep one going.

 

(source)

My sister had our father up to New Minas yesterday to the eye doctors to see what is going on with his sight. I have thought his right eye looked wonky for a while now.  There is nothing wrong with his eyes, they are both healthy except that the right eye, which is the one he always squints or shuts does not move. So they are setting up a CT scan in the next to see what might be causing that. To check his brain to see if anything is going on there that doesn't show up when they look in his eye. They said it is a good sign that his eye is not swollen. Cindy will be taking him back to the Ophthalmologist in a month's time to see what's up.

My sister is such a treasure. The way she takes care of dad is a credit to her.  And you know, when she was a teenager, dad was not particularly nice to her.  He said to me not that long ago how much he appreciated her care and I said to him I bet he wishes he had been nicer to her way back then. 

He's become quite incontinent in recent weeks and has fallen out of bed at least twice. My sister is a saint.  The way she cares for dad and the way she takes Bailey back and forth to Sheila's almost every day. Sheila always tells everyone that Cindy is babysitting Bailey, but the truth is Bailey is my sister's now pretty much.  They are just waiting for a space in a care home for Sheila according to one of the carers my sister spoke to. She is not competent enough to care for herself any longer.  Sad to say.

 

(source)

My ex dropped off a new pair of trainers to Eileen on Sunday afternoon. I guess he has another pair ordered as well, at least I understood him to say that.  He's been texting her each day to see how she is doing. Yesterday he told her that they had had 23 people at his place for Thanksgiving Dinner. My daughter and her family were down from Halifax, and probably my son and his family from the next town over and who knows who all else. The grands were playing football in the front yard he said. I try not to let these things bother me. I have not seen my daughter since Eileen's wedding 14 years ago. Nor heard from her either. I did message her the other night to ask her a question about Eileen's condition, hoping she would be able to help me with something. She is a nurse practitioner and I thought she would be able to help. I could see where she had read it, but she never responded.  It is what it is and there is not a lot that I can do about it.  Not really. But I would be lying if I said it didn't make me feel sad. 

 

(source)

Another few weeks and we will have trick or treaters at the door. Eileen is looking forward to handing out the candy this year.  I have a few boxes of chocolate bars in, but I think I better get a few other bits so that we have enough. I always worry about running out. Even when my kids were small I would worry that I was going to run out of candy to hand out. I even dreamt about it. Anxiety dreams. I have them about all the holidays and they are always the same, it is the day and I haven't prepared enough. Not for Thanksgiving, not Halloween, not Christmas, not Easter . . .  funny that. I have no idea why.

 

(source)

I was sitting here looking out the window yesterday while Eileen was having her nap. We are a street of older women, mostly unattached. There is only one of us that has a husband, and that is Zillah on my right hand side.  He's a dear.  He has helped me to fix my bird feeder and I just know did I ask him for help with anything he would help.  Zillah also. Good, good people.  I think the next street over is also older single women as well. Most of us will end up on our lonesome in our old age, unless we are really blessed. Women generally outlive their husbands it is said.  Also in the case of divorce or separation, men are always a lot quicker to find someone else.  It's easier for them. Not so easy for women.  Men have a much larger pool to pick from. I discovered that when I found myself single in my early 40's. Men in their 40's didn't want a woman in her 40's, neither did many men in their 50's. They wanted much younger women, and had no trouble finding them.  Its funny how that goes.  When men look in the mirror at themselves, they see Adonis . . .  women, when they look in the mirror see reality. haha

Although, I'll be honest here, I have seen a few reels on IG of women in their 70's and 80's (clearly) acting and dressing etc. like they are in their 40's. I don't get that personally, but who am I to judge.

And with that I will close this off and leave you with a thought for the day . . . 

☾ ° ★° * 。  

• ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ • •。★★ 。* 。
° 。 ° ˛˚˛ * _Π_____*。*˚
˚ ˛ •˛•˚ */______/~＼。˚ ˚ ˛
˚ ˛ •˛• ˚ ｜ 田田 ｜門 ★

*Don't give to get.

Give to inspire others to give.

~Simon Sinex

In The English Kitchen today, Fluffy Buttermilk Drop Biscuits. Simple, delicious and on the table in less than half an hour.

I hope you have a beautiful Wednesday.  Be happy. Be blessed. Don't forget!

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⊰✿░G░O░D⊰✿⊰L░O░V░E░S⊰✿⊰░Y░O░U░⊰✿

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And I do too!