My mind wanders . . .

 

Sometimes I have days where I feel sad right down into the core of me and I need to remind myself over and over again that  . . .  I am blessed.  Days that instead of dwelling on all the things I am longing for . . . .  and by that I don't mean material things . . . I need to dwell on all the things that I do have and that do bring me joy.   I think it is called counting your glass as being half full instead of half empty. 

  

I think it is quite natural for us to sometimes dwell on our losses, instead of appreciating what we haven't lost.  We need to stop doing that.  When we focus more on what we have lost, we miss out on the blessings of enjoying some of the joy of what we still have.  Focusing on our losses can cloud our vision and stunt our growth. 

  

 It can prevent us from seeing and feeling things that we really need to see and to feel  . . .  it can eclipse the sunshine in our lives . . .  and fill our days with darkness . . . 

 

If we spend our time focusing on the rain alone and just the clouds, we take the chance that we will miss out on the rainbow altogether.

  

Life is good . . .  very, very good.  We must remind ourselves that nobody has a perfect life. We all have things we wish we might have done differently . . .  regrets, sorrows and losses . . . .  but those are only a very small part of our lives.  Much, much more of our lives are composed of things we can be proud of . . .  small triumphs . . . .  joys and gains.  

 Sometimes we need to remind ourselves of all the things we have done

right in life, rather than dwelling on all the things which we

have done wrong. 

 

I know I am imperfect.  Others are too.  I need to be able to accept their imperfections and move forward, accepting that perhaps things will never change. It can be really hard to do that, especially when tender feelings and the heart are involved. We want what we want now.  We forget that others are taking this journey also, and that being imperfect is a part of their journey, along with the choices they make.  I shouldn't take it personally. It is hard though when people you love with all of your heart choose  not to love you back, and choose to shut you out . . . . it is something I have a really hard time comprehending, because I could never be that way. I  just love the people I love, no matter what . . .  there is nothing they can or could do that I would not be able to forgive them for, or get past. Even this.

 Maybe I am like a dog in that way.  Dogs love you unconditionally, no matter how, no matter what you do or how you treat them.  They are as happy to see you when you come back into the room whether you have been away for 5 seconds or 5 years. You get the same enthusiastic, uncontrollably love filled greeting. And they just love you because you are you with no strings attached.

Something happens when you get older  . . .  when your hands become a bit emptier and your days a bit less busy. When you realise that you have a lot  less of the road you are traveling on in front of you than road which lays  behind you  . . .  

You decide to make your days count like you never have before.

You recogise that each day is a blessing that

will never come again.  

 

 I can choose to spend the rest of my life unhappy and dwelling on my losses . . . or I can choose to spend it counting the joy.  I choose to count the joy, even if sometimes I might stumble and dwell on the things I shouldn't. (I need to make myself a sign that I can use to remind myself of that often, until it starts to come naturally.)

I think that when I turn 65 (and I hope that I do) I will retire, retire.  Just spend my days doing what I want to do.  Stop chasing deadlines.  Why don't I do that now?  I dunno . . .  because I have responsabilities I guess . . . contracts to fulfil. 

Really,  the things that I do, I happen to enjoy.  My life is very full.  I think by saying I want to retire, I mean that I want to change the focus of my life somewhat and start pleasing me more than pleasing others. That sounds so selfish  . . .  I know. 

This has just been a really hard, hard, hard year  . . . and it ain't over yet.  

You know, yesterday I went to the Doctors for my BP check (as it has been raised) and I was told that I wasn't due to come until Thursday.  I don't know how I did that.  I was sure I was supposed to have it checked on Tuesday for it and not Thursday.  The two words are very similar and perhaps I heard it wrong when the Nurse was making up my appointments the last time I was there.  I was supposed to go to physio for my arm on Thursday, but I have cancelled that.  I am also due to have my flu shot on Thursday.  Interestingly enough, since I started getting the flu shot each year I have not had a really bad cold. (Knock on wood!) I used to spend from October until January coughing my guts up with a chest cold that never seemed to abate. 

I have two recipes I am working on for the Knife Expert site today. I got them all set up yesterday and the ingredients organised. Now today I will shoot the action photos, cook, shoot the finished photos and then edit them all. Then tomorrow I will write up the articles.  There is no rest for the wicked.  But I am grateful for this little job of mine as it helps to make up the difference in the rent increase, and I am being paid to do what I love to do.  God is good. 

A thought to carry with you  . . . 

° * 。 • ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ •
•。★★ 。* 。
° 。 ° ˛˚˛ * _Π_____*。*˚
˚ ˛ •˛•˚ */______/~＼。˚ ˚ ˛
˚ ˛ •˛• ˚ ｜ 田田 ｜門 ★
 *Like wildflowers

you must grow in all the places

people never thought you would.

° * 。 • ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ •° * 。 • ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ • 

 

In The English Kitchen today  . . .  White Batter Rolls.  Just mix it up, let it rise, spoon the dough into muffin tins and then bake.  Easy peasy.

Have a wonderful Wednesday. The sun is shining here.  I hope it is shining there also. Don't forget! 

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And I do too!